So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
