Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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