Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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