I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
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