Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
