Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
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It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
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Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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