come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
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By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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