pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
