New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Randomize
