So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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