She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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