I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize
