the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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