I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize