You did not just play the dead husband card again.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.