can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
She made me pour olive oil on her.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
