He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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