how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
Randomize
