I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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