so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
i out mim tonsoeep
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