Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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