You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize
