Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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