I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
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Beer Popsicles are better in theory
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
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