i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
