can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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