If i could tip my vagina, i would.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize