I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
wow bdsm is so cute
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
