3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
