physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
