Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Randomize
