Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Dicks are not precious.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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