Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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