I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
