He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
There's always time for handjobs
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
