I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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