So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
my liver is dry heaving
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize