I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
