what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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