I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
