Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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