he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
no you cant smoke seaweed
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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