no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Mom said you looked used
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I think my nap took me to another dimension
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
