Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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