i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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