Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I wish life had little blips of pornography
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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