My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
