So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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