mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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