just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
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