1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
I think scott just propositioned me for sex
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
